News roundup (we ring the bell then run like hell)

Peru gets to enjoy Wikileaks for about the first time, when the idiot US ambassador at the time makes mental noodlings about the narco-corruption inside Peru's army, notes how he thinks military chiefs are paid off by the narcos and gets them all huffy and puffy and indignant. Personally, I think ex-Ambassador to Peru McKinley (now hanging in Colombia) is right in the general suspicion stakes but has conjectured over the wrong details. Because he's a dumbass. Gotta love wikileaks as it shows just how blunt the sharp minds really are.

Wikileaks and Venezuela are two words that go together well, because due to media brain conditioning it's about the only country that you gringos care about down here. Anyway, Setty does the job of keeping us up to date with the drip-drip-drip. Unsurprisingly, Alvaro Uribe has so far come across as far more of a brutish and belligerent character than that guy Hugo with the beret.

There's an old saying in Buenos Aires Argentina. "If your car gets stolen, go look for it in Asuncion" (capital of Paraguay). According to Brazil's Canal F, that one holds true for Sao Paulo Brazil as well. Its report covers how cars stolen from the big metropoles get trucked to Paraguay via bribed police checkpoints and barges that cross the Itaipu lake. Then they're swapped for armaments, drugs or an average of U$2000 a piece if there's nothing laying around to play swapsies with.  

Bolivia uncovers another massive cocaine factory on its lands being run on a Colombian technology model in the eastern Santa Cruz region. You won't get to hear about this or any other of the efforts made by the brave and hard-working FELCN Bolivian drugs squad anywhere else (in English anyway) because your media wants you to believe something completely different about Bolivia.

Chart of the day is....

...Paraguay GDP growth, 2003 to date.

Paraguay affairs are seldom reported even in fellow S.Am countries, but a quick look at this chart shows it's on the same kind of track as a whole bunch of regional states. No matter what kind of political leadership, the story is repeated in Paraguay, Peru, Uruguay, Colombia, Bolivia. Brazil. However, the only ones you tend to hear about in gushing raptures are those that bend over to gringo FDI at any cost. Funny dat, innit?

By the way, data from here.

Good Lugo News

 IKN prefers photos of Lugo from the time when he had hair

Last Thursday, President Fernando Lugo of Paraguay had a serious relapse in his current fight against cancer (he's under chemotherapy right now) and had to be rushed to the specialist hospital treating him in Brazil. Well, the good new is that today he's out of intensive care and likely to be discharged Wednesday.

Wishing you the best.

News roundup (we offer a trim, shave and something for the weekend, sir)

chop chop!

The Economist is often mediocrity defined when it comes to its LatAm coverage, but it does offer up some decent perspectives on occasion (which keeps me from scrubbing its LatAm desk from my RSS). A good example today as TE offers up Ethanol's mid-life crisis on Brazil's sugar/ethanol sector. Interesting reading material and food for thought.

In our Presidential libido gossip column section, Paraguay's Lugo, currently under treatment for cancer, is not the father of one of the football team he's supposed to have procreated, according to DNA testing announced this week. Two positives and a negative so far.

We like that Brazil's Lula and Colombia's Santos have signed an eight point bilateral trade agreement this week. Lula then presented Santos with a pretty gong to hang round his neck and Santos said warm and fuzzy things about how wonderful Brazil is. Ahhh, ain't diplomacy cute sometimes?

Oh noes! Argentina is Communist too! The turncoats have only gone and bought a truckload of Russian military hardware, for the first time ever, too. Whatever happened to those carnal relations of the 90's eh? (update: link now works)

A taxi driver accused of sexual abuse his female passengers in Lima denies the charges, as (in his words) he only forced them to perform oral sex while threatening them with a screwdriver. Oh well, that's alright then, isn't it?

News roundup (we lick the rocks others fear to lick)

Setty got the background on how journalists get hired freelance-style to do corporate dirty work in LatAm. Today's best read.

Aguachile (a new reco on the list, great takes on Mexico issues) has the story of how Mexico is slapping trade embargoes on the USA, having been miffed once too often by its Northern neighbour's idea of "free trade". Go see.

Paraguay's Lugo has cancer, which is not good at all. He completed one of his chemotherapy sessions last weekend (he goes over to SP Braz for those) and has five more to do. Word from this report is that he's going to take all sessions on weekends to stop interference with his job as little as possible....which after all is nothingless than running a country.

Structurally Maladjusted has disappeared. Nearly a month with nothing posted...what gives, guys?

And then there's this, which is really difficult to put into words, except to say that those offended by bodily functions should not click through. I....errrr...."thank" the person who gave me the headsup on this....errr....unusual pictorial diary.

Four of Eight!

Congratulations Paraguay on reaching the World Cup quarter finals (even though it was a deathly boring match and you scraped in on penalties). That makes four of the last eight teams South American, impressive when you think that the continent only sent five and one was only just knocked out by fellow continental Brazil.

South America: Teaching the world how to play since 1930.

non-gold mining in Paraguay

Latin American Minerals (LAT.v), Sheldon Inwentash's Hail Mary shot at mining gold in Paraguay, was featured in this report by Paraguay's newspaper of record, ABC Color, late last month. To say that progress has been slow over at LAT.v is an understatement but at least here we find out why. The report tells of local protests, of artisanal miners who want a part of the LAT.v Paso Yobái concession handed over so they can mine for gold, of violent protests against the ABC Color reporter who covered the story etc. The last paragraph of the report seems to sum up the situation well, as the reporter quotes local company manager Juan Carlos Benítez:

"Benítez added that for the last 22 days the company has removed its personnel from Paso Yobái, due to violent threats from the protestors. "

Moral: When playing the LatAm junior mining sector, stick to the serious countries.

A World Cup Classic

This humble corner of cyberspace has, up to today, resisted the dozens of possible post themes related to the World Cup Finals. But today we crack and give in to temptation (hell, we're only two days away now, gotta say something about a sports tournament that will affect LatAm GDP in a bigtime manner).

Our story is from Paraguay and shows you just how lucky some people can be. Translated from this EFE wire:

The Vice-President of Paraguay, Federico Franco, is travelling to South Africa "to cheer on the team" thanks to a ticket that his wife won in a prize draw, the Paraguayan dignitary announced Tuesday.

"My wife won the draw to travel (to South Africa)" the VP told journalists when telling them he was flying to South Africa on Sautrday to support the national team.

The congresswoman Emilia Alfaro, wife of Franco, won the ticket for the South Africa World Cup 2010 in a draw run by a local company for its clients, according to local media.

Lucky, lucky, lucky.

News roundup (we sniff the bottoms of junkyard dawgs that others fear to sniff)

Another day, another journalist murdered in Colombia. Another story guaranteed to be unreported up North, but if some hack in Venezuela gets stared at in a nasty way you can bet that gets splashed over the front pages.

Mexicans are fat because of NAFTA? That's the theory proposed by Structurally Maladjusted and it must be true cos they got the stats to prove it.....TO PROVE IT I SAY!

Paraguay bans smoking in all enclosed public areas. This is good.


The US Defense dude Robert Gates is in Peru and Colombia this week. Here's what he has to say about Peru (and in true milico style getting the "compare it to Chavez" moneyline in).

“Peru has been a constructive influence, in our view, in South America in terms to trying to counter some of the propaganda and other things from Venezuela and in trying to represent what we are trying to do in a straightforward manner,” Gates said. “Peru has been a good friend to the United States.”

So no bones there. But the best one is when he addresses Venezuela and Bolivia, with one of the finest mirror reflections I've seen this year:

“I think there is an element of distracting their own populations from the difficulties that they have by … trying to strut around the world stage,” Gates said.

Gotts luv them US grunts: Destroy that village in order to save it, dudes.

Real cojones

Salvador spots a Canadian equities analyst in the crowd

Salvador Cabañas, the Paraguayan national striker who was shot in the head in Mexico (and featured on IKN) is awake, responding and getting better after coming out of various emergency operations and a coma.

According to this report, the first words he had to say were "I'm fine" to his dad, and he went on to tell him not to worry, because "I'm going to play in the World Cup". Damn, that guy has balls. The dude featured in the post underneath could learn a thing or two from him. Get well soon.

News roundup (we nibble at the applecores that others nonchalantly toss over their shoulders)

US GDP third quarter GDP revised down. Krugman got the insight needed. We got a cool chart above. Dow coming back down? Pimco seems to think so, judging by the bonds trade Billy G has just made.

Peru's Shining Path scumballs are trying to get themselves into the next set of elections by setting up a 'democratic' party. How anyone can even consider this as viable is beyond me. These people are responsible for tens of thousands of murders, some in the most horrific ways possible. There is a case for censorship in modern society and these people do not deserve a voice or the right to free speech.

Today's 'No Shit Sherlock' award goes to the government of Paraguay, which called the recently uncovered coup plot against Fernando Lugo "illegal". Ain't gonna hear many arguing the use of that adjective, dudes.

In a clear communist plot to take over the world, Venezuela donates 5.1 million energy saving lightbulbs to Ecuador to help lighten the energy crisis load brought on by the local drought.

Argentina's INDEC stats office does something unheard of in more than two years of macro country reporting and tells the truth. Unemployment is recorded up at 9.1% in Argentina for the third quarter, up 1.3% YoY.

Two Venezuelans in Paraguay.....apparently.....

A strange story out of Paraguay this week. Apparently, on November 12th a Venezuela armed forces C-130 Hercules took off from Ezeiza airport, Argentina.

The plane landed in Asuncion Paraguay, taxied into a hangar then after refuelling took off an hour later. According to reports, this mysterious plane had 14 people on board and left behind two of its crew members in Asuncion without them having to register through immigrations or anything else of the sort. On arrival in Caracas, Venezuela there were undoubtedly 12 people on board (here's an EngLang note from El Universal that gives the basic story).

When the press kicked up a fuss, the Paraguyan commander of the armed forces released this statement....

click to enlarge

...saying that there were only 12 people ever on board in the first place. The thing is, ABC Color clearly trusted its sources and smelled a rat. So the journos there did some more digging and sure enough found the flight record for the plane as noted by Argentina....

(click to enlarge)

...and sure enough, according those flight records there were 14 military personnel on board when the plane left Argentina. In the words of ABC Color:

"...the names of Rafael Polo and José Gélvez appear on the list that left Buenos Aires, but not in the list that went to Caracas."

So what were two Venezuelan military guys doing hitching a lift from their pals in Argentina and then getting off in Paraguay without going through any sort of immigration procedure? Inquiring minds and all that............

News roundup (we sniff the bottoms of the mongrel dogs that others fear to sniff)

OH NOES! SECRET OIL DOLLAR CONSPIRACY! Dumbasses fall for this crap every time, but Mish nails the issue in this post. Gimme a freakin' break here, dudes....

Argentina: Why do we lurve da booorev? Let's take yesterday's note by the WSJ on Argentina and the IMF:

"Deranged psycho killer will never understand why the orphan child of the mother it once strangle-raped cannot return its love".

Oh yes, we love da booorev.

Paraguay: Beats me why AP is so, so bad sometimes, cos other times they nail great stories. Check out this one on Paraguay that starts

"Three police chiefs imprisoned for torture have finally have been fired after collecting their salaries from behind bars since 1995, Paraguay's interior minister said Tuesday."

Peru: The strike at Shougang's iron ore mine in Peru is now eight days old. Reason for strike? The deal brokered by workers and management to end the last strike has been totally ignored by the Chinese management. It's the future of Kapitalism, Komrade.

Any subject you like...

....as long as it isn't futbol.

Paraguay 1, Argentina 0 tonight, with Paraguay deserving the win fair and square. Great goal, too.

Argentina now in the 5th placed playoff position behind Ecuador and only one point ahead of Uruguay (their opponents in the final round). Argentina plays Peru at home next and the way they're playing that's no guarantee home win, either. Uff...they say "lucky in money unlucky in love" don't they? double uff

Now tell me all 'bout it, Sketch ;-)

Dam funny

Remember this post that laughed heartily over the Motley Fool "analysis"of the Itaipu hydroelectric dam on the Paraguay/Brazil border entitled "Will Brazil and Paraguay Go to War over Itaipu?". Well let's check how that military buildup is coming, shall we? Here's Bloomie:

Brazil agreed to triple to about $360 million the amount it pays annually to Paraguay for electricity generated by the jointly owned Itaipu dam, ending a feud over which country benefits more from the world’s largest hydroelectric dam by output.

President Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva and his Paraguayan counterpart, Fernando Lugo, announced the “historic agreement” today in Asuncion, after months of stalled negotiations.

The pact also will allow Paraguay to bypass state- controlled utility Centrais Eletricas Brasileiras SA and sell directly its unused power in Brazil before the dam’s debt is to be repaid in 2023. A detailed timetable for Paraguay’s entry into Brazil’s energy market will be negotiated in the next three months.

Paraguay’s half-share of the dam’s $19 billion debt to Eletrobras and Brazil’s government wasn’t altered, as Lugo had been lobbying for since negotiations started about a year ago.

“It’s of no interest to Brazil that it develops, if our partners don’t also grow and develop,” Lula said in a speech following the signing of the agreement. “We bigger countries have the obligation to help smaller countries achieve a qualitative jump in their development and competitiveness.”

Cross-Border Cooperation

Lugo said he expected some groups in both countries will criticize their leaders for ceding too much in talks.

“We haven’t agreed on every point and there were differences,” he said. “But we’ve shown the political maturity to seek consensus and areas where we are in agreement.”

CONTINUES HERE

All in all a very nice result for Paraguay...and without a single shot fired, Tim Hanson of Motley Dumbass.

Paraguay, Sex and drugs, (no rock'n'roll..yet)

They asked him to resign, and he resigned.

This crazy Paraguay place will start getting a hedonistic reputation sooner or later, mark my words.

• First you have a President with a background of extracurricular activities not normally associated with Catholic bishops (by that I mean he's into adult women more than the usual temptation traps) and with a child support burden to match.

• Then there's the recent data that has Paraguay as the world's number two producer of marijuana (ask anyone in Buenos Aires about the quality and they'll grin cheesily).

• And now a new scandalette, with Paraguay's ambassador to Chile caught with his pants (about to be) down at a bachelor party (photos from here).

This Armando Espínola dude in question, who is married to one very pissed off wife, is also famed for another sexy moment a few years ago when he was caught on camera checking out girly photos on his laptop while voting for a new law while a member of Paraguay's senate. He today resigned his diplomatic post in Chile and is presumably on his way back to sexytown Asuncion.


Now to be fair to Espínola, he said that the photos were taken years ago at a bachelor party and that someone had recently tried to blackmail him with the evidence.

Nice wig, Armando

When he refused, the presumed blackmailer went to the local Paraguay scandalrag 'Popular' to sell their wares. Darnit, there must be something in that tereré to get all these political hormones rushing about. Well, at least the guy had enough gumption to resign, not like that tosser Berlusconi in Italy.

News Roundup (picking the fluff off the mohair sweater that is Monday)

Shock! Mary OhYesExtremelyStableWhyDidYouAsk O'Grady uses her WSJ column to call Hugo Chávez 'a dictator'...well, if it comes from her it must be true, right?

Insulza tells it as it is: Honduras is on the brink of civil war, according to the man that pisses everybody off by turn (i.e. ain't nobody's lapdog, Hillary).

France tells Studmuffin that playing hardball with Perenco might harm future investments in Muffinland...Rafa then phones Sarko and mentions something about Argentina's new FinMin Boudou...which seems a bit of a non-seq at first.

Paraguay suddenly becomes LatAm's new fashion tourist destination as it's revealed it's the world's second biggest producer of marijuana. Bring your own Pink Floyd long-playing albums, oldtimers.

The South America Swine Flu Sweepstakes Update June 23

Here's the new chart, folks.

Click to enlarge

Uruguay finally released its figures and has jumped right up the chart with 195 cases. But biggest mover is Brazil, scoring 94 cases in just one day (Monday) and snatching third place from Peru.

Runaway leader Chile hasn't updated its numbers for a few days, so that 4,315 is surely higher by now. UPDATE; 10 minutes after publishing Chile came out with its new number, 5,186 cases....the chart above has been updated. Reports in Chilean media now talk about "collapsed health services" with the number of cases (and suspected cases) swamping hospital staff. Happy days.

The South America Swine Flu Sweepstakes Update 19 June

Hot off the presses here are the latest regional numbers for swine flu, or potato flu or AH1N1 if you really insist.

Click to enlarge

Chile stretching that lead again and into the 4,000s now. Argentina may be second on the infecteds list but has the most amount of regional deaths, at six.

Peru is at 185 and when this all started the country's health minister assured his people that nobody would die of swine flu on his watch. Well I dunno about the condition of each patient, but statistics are starting to play against him methinks.

O pais mais grande do mundo has moved up from 5th to 4th all of a sudden, beating Euador into the three-figure column. Further down the field, Paraguay has just doubled its number of infected tonight.

UPDATE: The latest out of Argentina tonight is 1,010 official positive cases and another death. That makes seven total in Argentina. Health Minister Ocaña tonight talked of her "deep worry" about the unfolding situation. Moral: don't supersize me.

Paraguay update

Nadya Suleman, last seen heading for Asuncion

Fernando Lugo, South America's most fecund head of state, said last weekend that "only God is perfect" in relation to his ever growing paternity issues which is now at three kids and rumoured to be heading to seven. However it's also noticeable how all the scandal has actually made him more popular in machoman Paraguay where virility seemingly scores more points with the masses than maintaining vows of chastity. This has clearly ticked off the establishment opposition in the still powerful Colorado Party that must have been drooling over a resignation or a coup for a while back there. Now that the good ship Lugo is sailing through the paternity hoo-hah in fine style, frustration is beginnning to show as today ex-President Lino Oviedo called Lugo "indignant and immoral". He also went on to say:

"We have been ignored by him (Lugo) and he has to understand that the time of the single leader is over. A person of this immoral calibre cannot be spoken to....He doesn't accept the agenda of others but makes others accept his. He has to understand the (dictator and Ex President Alfredo) Stroessner is dead, that this man should understand that this is no longer inside democracy."

So by way of a bit of background to Oviedo's declarations today, let's try and give you a bit of equal context about Oviedo calling Lugo "immoral and indignant".

Example one: Madonna is scandalized by the fact that Britney Spears isn't a virgin.

Example two: Barry Bonds horrified by stories that track&field athletes take performance enhancing drugs.

Example three: Dick Cheney shocked about the way The Hawaiian might fudge an issue or two about foreign policy.

I could go on, but you should have the picture by now.